Three levels of torment in one cup

Sometimes we are inspired to try new things, sometimes we ignore that little voice in the back of your mind telling you to stop. Last Night I ignored this voice.

I have some awesome memories from camping as a child. As a cub-scout, with mum and her rather large troupe of girl guides… with the family on the many road trips around the south island to meet distant kissing cousins. Often rained out there was always one saving grace to warm your bones.

This bad boy was there to warm you up, give you that shot of coffee with a good hit of sugar, and get you motivated to lift all of your gear off the ground and take the sleeping bags into the nearest Laundromat. Nowadays the toothpaste tube of coffee has been replaced by the single serve, just add hot water sachet.

All this semester I have seen these little sticks of doom. First in the O’week goodie bags, then outside the psychology office in a massive box labelled ‘free to a good home’, in the Waikato students’ union reception. These little monstrosities have been unavoidable. Today, I was given another handful by the WSU president in the Level 0 basement. I caved.

Nescafe 3 in 1 appears innocent enough… It is marketed as the penultimate coffee of those with very little time, or very little packing space, the coffee for the travelling salesman. The coffee for the camping man. As it is by far the cheapest (being freely available on campus) and by and large the most accessible hot beverage on campus, I gave the stuff a run.

The Stuff looked sick when made up. No really, a greeny brown colour… smelled kinda earthy too. I added a bit of cold water to make it drinkable and gave it a sip. Sugary would be my first call. Much Like other instant coffee it left my teeth squeaky. I was expecting this, but I was not expecting my teeth to start itching too (WHAT IS IN THIS STUFF?!). Checking the little bag it came in I could see no ingredient list. The Nescafe website lists “Soluble coffee with whitener and sugar”. Yet the image of the bag has what looks like a far larger list of things. However, after a bit more digging…

Sugar (52%), Whitener (38%), (Glucose Syrup, Hydrogenated Vegetable Oil, Skimmed Milk Powder, Acidity Regulators (E340ii, E451i, E452i, E331iii), Milk Proteins, Vegetable Fat, Emulsifiers (E471, E472e), Flavourings, Anti-Caking Agent (E551), Stabiliser (E339), Salt), Instant Coffee (10%).

…What is all this stuff?!

I took another sip habitually while writing the above list out. This stuff was tolerable hot, but the good ol’ swig of the now warm toxic sludge… It reminded me of one of those little Asian power drinks with a ginseng root floating in it, but with a milky white scum layer. Sugary mud comes to mind. I tipped the rest in the sink and sought redemption.

Now I know that some of you out there are not big on the teas but I have become tolerant of your bean grinding ways, let it be said: no man, woman, or child should have to suffer the pain of drinking this 3 in 1 nasty beverage, save those whom have earned a place within the inner circles of Dante’s Inferno.

Sadly, I could not find it in the tube, but they do make it by the can!

This stuff is simple. Three ingredients on the list all up, Condensed milk, Instant Coffee, and Salt. Compared to the above its simplicity is profound, and the taste… amazing, Better than many coffees I’ve received from cafes. You can eat it straight out of the tin; it tastes like coffee hard boiled candy (the good Asian kind).

My recommendation, not that it needs to be said: stick to the simple, tried and true. Avoid the nasty 3 in 1 under all circumstances (Now to go eat the rest of the can with a spoon).

Skinny cow better for Tea

For quite some time now It has been brought to my attention that the best milk for with a cup of tea is a trim milk one. So I have decided to put this to the test over the past few months taking note of the kind of milk used when out and about, and the taste of the resulting tea.

Now I’m a big fan of organic everything, and here in New Zealand, at least from what I can tell it is damn near impossible to get a trim organic milk without going to some specialty store. So for the longest time it has been either whole milk, or full cream milk, or something similar to a blue top milk (Standardised, homogenised milk). I discovered that unhomogenised full cream milk (whole milk) to leave a creamy film on the top of the tea. This is fantastic for a coffee, or a hot chocolate… but seems to produce a metallically, icky scum that spoils the tea (Cream in tea by the way, is most foul and unrecommended).

Your standard milk (Dark blue top, standardised and homogenised) is the run-of-the-mill go to milk for most households. And is generally what I get for various reasons: it tastes like milk on its own, a bit creamy (good butterfeel in the mouth), It goes good on cereal and works well in cooking and baking, generally by adding richness to the dish. Yet in comparison to a lite, or trim milk, the flavour of a cup of tea is soured slightly.

Sadly, due to its transparent bottle I have had to dispose of the standard due to the flash degrading the milk.

Today, I have been playing with this bottle of calci-trim on some Kenyan teas (more on that next post). As you can see from the picture, the two teas are different in completion with added milk (I used a two pot method to maintain consistency from this leaf tea, and added a single shot of each milk type for consistency), so too is the flavour with a more robust flavour for the trim, and no dairy aftertaste. This allows for a better appreciation of the tea from start to finish, so for the tea connoisseur, just brilliant!

Why I cut back on the cheap tea

Hamilton city council, with all its infinite wisdom has decided to discontinue the addition of fluoride to the town water supply. Regardless of your personal views on this topic, the district health board/dental associations “Emperical’ evidence, or any other number of crackpot, tinfoilhat wearing conspiracy nutjob thoughts, there are some important points to remember about fluoride.

• It artificially hardens your teeth (fluoride is not a required substance for life)
• Fluoride is really, really good at killing bacteria (including those in your gut, hence we do not swallow our mouthwash/toothpaste)
• Fluoride also accumulates in all areas where calcium does such as; bones, teeth, brain tissue, milk glands, tendons, sperm…

This is why there are limits placed on the quantity of fluoride in the water supply (1.0ppm in NZ, 2.0ppm in the US). Too much can lead to fluorosis of your bones and teeth making them brittle. This is not so much of an issue if you are an adult as there is lots of body mass for fluoride to disperse on. Not so good for children, even worse for babies. A good way to explain this is with another form of drug taken on a nearly daily basis, Paracetamol. The recommended dosage is ½ a pill for the kiddies and up to 2 for an adult, this is to prevent overdose and the same applies to fluoride. The NZ Ministry of health recommendation is that baby formula is manufactured with pure water, and that baby formula should not be made up with tap water. Otherwise baby’s teeth come out moulted, when grown children become prone to bone breakages, and at worst your kids baby teeth come out looking like three year crack addicts.

The tea plant, Camellia sinensis is
a known fluoride accumulator. Fluoride particles are taken up by the root system and distributed into the leaves, accumulating over time. As such the older the leaves are the more fluoride is within them. Generally, tea leaves are supposed to be picked in a very particular way (the bud, and the 4 or 6 leaves below it on the stalk). So with any high quality tea you can expect that there is a minimal amount of fluoride accumulated in the leaves in comparison to the older ones on the bush. It has been recently suggested that tea quality can be determined by examining fluoride levels in the prepared tea.

Some large corporations employ machines to pick the leaves, and just get ‘expert leaf sorters’, a loose term which translates to underemployed temporary labour hires in third world countries.( If you were earning 5c an hour, how hard would you be willing to check the right leaves were picked?). Teabag tea is also mulched to produce a quicker brew. This also allows the Fluoride to steep out faster too. As such the better the younger the leaf, the less chopped the leaf, the higher the quality of the tea.

This is one of the main reasons I cut back on my cheap tea exploits. I like my teeth, bones, and brain (not so fussed if my swimmers malfunction right now) and as such I decided to investigate deeper into the area before potentially advising people to drink rubbish tea. If you haven’t already guessed, ITS NOT GOOD FOR YOU.

As a result of these finds I have for the past few months drunk a considerable amount of loose leaf tea of varying quality and grades. A new fave of mine is the Zealong tea produced here in New Zealand. Organically certified and having been to the gardens several times and done the tour I can verify with my own eyes that these guys produce a stellar oolong tea, and to boot, the fluoride is likely to be very minuscule. I cannot say the same for the cheaper teas on the market.

Jury is still out on whether the HCC done goof removing the fluoride, I’m taking it as a sign to re-engage with dubious quality tea on a sample size basis, after all, I’m quite ok with crippled swimmers right now.

Out of the darkness, and into the light…

I must say, my previous experiences with the Dilmah earl grey were somewhat… unpleasant. I had put this down to poor selection of bergamot that assaulted my taste buds like a citrus based dishwashing liquid. This new release, Dilmah Single Region Selection Earl Grey is far less abrasive. Not as buttery as the twining’s earl grey, but a bit more edgy and dangerous. This is a surprisingly drinkable tea, and I am finding myself enjoying it black without milk or sugar.

I am sure you are all wondering how I can make these bold claims of advancement. Well I found a single serve Dilmah in foil tucked away in the emergency tea rations (yes, I have those) and the difference is very noticeable.

Dilmah Single Region Selection Earl Grey 50′s, sporting a new box with a big ol’ ethical tea business logo. Shiny.

If you’re wondering where I have been for the past couple of months I have been destroying my mind and eyes with graduate studies. The semester is nearing its end and I do intend to return to my beverage based reviews, commentary, and advice. But before that, I have two major exams left to conquer. Wish me Luck!

Hazelnut latte

A major shift in the hot beverage preparation sector has occurred in the past few years towards quick convenient single serve sachets. It is as though the major brands have finally found a way to compete with the tea bag… to add value to this a variety of ‘luxury’ single serve coffees have hit the market, having now suffered through some good, and others woefully bad, I decided to include coffees onto the blog. Now I admit, I personally know little more than the average coffee sinner, and I doubt I will be unable to advance any farther than instant brands until the bean juice drinkers here in the flat get a machine installed, but i can at best attempted to steer you clear of the worst of the bunch. This one is the first to avoid.

Over the many years of study at Waikato University I came to appreciate a god cup of coffee. The available tea was in general overpriced and badly made, so I branched into the coffee scene. Not being particularly fond of the coffee flavour I chose to have a Hazelnut shot in mine and that became my beverage of choice for the longest of times. It therefore comes at no small surprise I decided to try Nescafe’s Hazelnut latte (the box is extra shiny).

I looked really good in the cup, lots of fine velvet looking froth and dissolved fairly well when mixed with hot water, smelt like a coffee should too but no hint of the hazelnut flavour. The taste was much the same to my disappointment, no hazelnut flavour at all, but it did taste kinda soapy, which a good friend and guinea pig kindly informed me is normal for instants (Added soap to help dissolve the coffee properly (this also explains the soap suds foam on top, and the squeaky clean sound my teeth now make).

The coffee was not that strong either… but at least it didn’t taste burned. In future I’d rather buy a bottle of hazelnut syrup and add to taste than deal with the little packets of doom dust.

Greenfield Christmas Mystery

After my somewhat elated views on Christmas teas I decided to try another, just to see if Twinings had made a breakthough in Christmas wares or if others had achieved greatness.

Again I was surprised by the flavours, more so in the way both presented very differently in the end result. Greenfield teas produce Individually sealed foil bags which come in larger boxed packs of about 30 (I stole two bags of this tea out a friends pantry so I do not have a picture of the box… ) I can state that It was a bit busy on the exterior (much like the bag, only covering the whole box). What got me is that although they speak of all the different spices contained within on the back of the packet… however, they do not mention the star anise (nor can i taste it within the tea) I suspect, this was some advertising gurus way of selling the product due to it looking like a snow flake.

The tea itself was very sweet when prepared the same as the Twinings. It reminded me of Christmas cake, or wedding cake when prepared of the non-drinker. I suspect this is to do with the addition of citrus peel rather than just the spice. The perceived mouth feel is also less buttery and more crisp to the tongue with a slight citrusy finish which may be messing with the added milk. Maybe this tea will be better without milk and sugar.

The smell is divine and smells richly of spiced oranges, similar to the clove studded oranges found in wardrobes that I seem to recall from my youth… Deceptive would be one description for this tea. Bad wedding cake is another. It is at best watered down cordial (the cheap kind found on school camps). So If you are the kind of person who sits and smells a cup of tea only to find it stone cold hours later… this one is for you.

The only mystery this tea seems to have is the case of the missing flavour.

Christmas…

Every year without fail corporations begin to assault shoppers around the globe unrelentingly with Christmas carols by Evil-Elevator-Music-Inc, and release their wares developed in conjunction with the wondrous people at Tinsel-All-of-the-things. This generally produces a level of nausea only overcome by some kind of mind altering substance brought from a man wearing a Santa hat and lacking any front teeth…

Tea companies are no exception to the rule, and not more than a few weeks back I came across the Twining’s Christmas tea release. I walked past bitterly muttering under my breath words unsavoury for the joy and cheer of this time of year.

I decided for the sake of my blog, to try this demonic concoction which could only be expected to be some foul blend of an unenlightened cheap gimmick, and a brilliant way to dispose of a bad tea harvest by drowning it out in spices… then I saw the price tag, began a tirade of foul language that would make a Grinch blush, and promptly left the store.

On my third attempt I discovered not a box of the stuff to be seen. This was perplexing; generally this sort of stuff never moves until after Christmas day. It is seen at ¼ the price an large mountains… generally with a distraught looking sales man peddling the wares to whomever seems desperate enough. It dawned on me I may have made a mistake in judging this tea prematurely.

So after much hunting of supermarkets and on the verge of giving up I came across two solitary tins sitting in the tea section pushed well to the back, and partially obscured from sight. I grabbed one, swallowed my pride and brought it home hoping it was a spectacular failure and worthy of scathing ridicule. I was wrong.

This tea blew my mind away with every mouthful overwhelming my taste buds with flavours reminiscent of homemade Christmas mince pies. I can hear carols in my ears brought back from the smell of that particular blend of clove and cinnamon that make you think of Christmas crackers and brandy snaps. Following the directions on the box produces this effect, milk and one sugar. But if you want that sticky Christmas pudding flavour, try it with a bit of honey… it even leaves you feeling warm and satisfied, much like after a good solid Christmas feast.

For a long time I believed Twinings had lost their touch, fell afoul to the demons of corporate Christmas. I was wrong. Twinings makes great teas, brilliant competitive teas.

Lapsang souchong: Breath of the Dragon

Twining’s have done a loose leaf series called ‘Origins’ and this one, being labelled as 5 out of 5 in their strength scale… seemed like the obvious place to start. It is a pine smoked black tea from Fujian province in china.

When I first saw this tea, I was expecting something extraordinary, the box with its red hues seemed to ooze a fiery expectation. On opening the strong smokey aroma reminded me of the fish smoker and brought back fond memories of the peatiest of peaty scotches.

Lapsang Souchong Tea and my new pot and teawarmer stand

The dark amber colour under the new tea pot I received recently made it glow angrily and the aromas released in vapour, threatened to set off the smoke alarms, the teapot clearly sweating under the heat…

The dark fires of Mordor reflected in the potstand… signs of the flavour to come

Sipping it back brought back fond memories in my childhood of playing with e embers in the fire and staining the ceiling with soot… or sitting downwind of the campfire… it is warming and invigorating. as you can see.

Protip: Rinse the tea first with hot water to ‘release the dragon’, this removes some of the bitterness and also reduces the caffeine content so your not running around like your pants are on fire.

This is a tea well worth the experience, you may not like it, but Id recommend you try it anyway if the option were to present itself… It really is an experience that has proven itself to bring back all sorts of fond memories…

Where did that bottle come from? Whisk(e)y Regions

Whisky, whiskey, and bourbon all come with somewhat specific connotations and it is a good thing to keep your eye on to get an idea of where the bottle comes from and what to expect. Whisky generally refers to a bottle of Scottish origin, whiskey from Ireland as well as some places in north America, whereas bourbons are an American produced commodity generally from Kentucky or Tennessee but also other localities in the corn belt.

There are so many Scotch whiskies that Scotland is divided into several regions, these being Islay, Island, speyside, lowlands and west, east, and northern highlands. Loosely there are particular characteristics associated with each; Islay and Islands for example are normally peated as well as containing salty, and Iodine notes, whereas the speysides are generally softer with oaty notes. This is only a loose distinction, but a useful one when whittling down your buying options.

Most Scotch whisky is double distilled with some softer malts triple distilled, the Irish, however, tend to run the spirit four times and generally oven roast the barley giving no peat or smoke flavour. Bourbons, are in my view a different beast altogether, they are very rough, woody and if anything are a tad young for my liking. so rough is this drop that I know of few who can tolerate it and fewer still who drink it straight.

One oddball in the mix are the Japanese whiskies; the Japanese Love whisky and as such several very prestigious distilleries have cropped up, some even going as far as to import heather and peat from Scotland! There are also other minor distillates from around the globe, New Zealand has an amazing history in whisky production (I will delve into that in a later post), while India and some other middle eastern countries have also dabbled into whiskey production.

Personally I prefer scotch whisky; Islays and Island regions specifically, however, I have been surprised by a couple of bourbons and the occasional rare drop from far distant or local lands.

Borrowed from joejag’s site, a good simple pic although I view Campbeltown as part of highlands personally.

Passport Scotch whisky blended

The first time I attempted to try the Passport Scotch whisky was just after my parents had moved to Australia. As there were few who have not fled the nation for the land of milk and honey (or as I like to know it blocked nasals and stupidly high humidity) I inherited what was left undrunk, which included a collection of miniatures. There is an interesting family story that goes along with miniatures and one must be most careful to check the seal is still intact before placing it to ones lips for a swig. The mouthful of ancient ice cold tea was not what I was expecting, but came as little shock to me.

I honestly thought this was a dead brand and had decided to shrug off this famous drop as one that I would never get to experience… Until recently, when I discovered it had been re-released! After saving up for a couple of weeks I made my purchase and it has become my current quaffing scotch.

It is a Speyside blend, with liberal amounts of lowland whisky added to it, most likely cut with some form of grain whisky to bring the price down to a moderate level. Expectedly it is like honey on the nose, with a hint of peat following later in the breath. The bottle I’m drinking from is half full at this stage and has been for some time, therefore the spirit has softened slightly as happens when there is more air than fluid in the bottle. This can be a good thing in some cases, and in this case it detracts little from the first experience on the tongue. The peaty flavour comes forth first followed by malty tones that are reminiscent of marmite (oh how I lament for our unobtainable spread!), the finish lingers on in for a rather short period of time with the flavours on the palate leaving not long after.

This is a very pleasant drop on a budget, it does have a higher viscosity and thus has an almost oily mouth feel, this is not a bad thing as it helps it coat the mouth giving a fuller flavour. The colour is light amber, almost straw so I do not suspect any caramel has been added to the mix. This is (according to some sites) an up and coming blend and I for one can completely understand why; this blend is good bang for your buck.